So it’s a new year right? I’m not gonna talk about that or resolutions I have no intention of keeping. My only goal is one I have had my whole life and that is to KEEP GOING even if my body isn’t cooperating.
I’ve known a life of illness and struggle due to side effects to cure the rare cancer I had as a childhood Neuroblastoma. But because of those treatments I have been fortunate to have these years to live, have a loving and supportive family, amazing friends, the best sister I could ask for, a phenomenal husband and a son who I can give my whole heart to, who I will do anything for no matter what.
If anyone knows struggle it’s my own mother. She has had to be strong for me my whole life, sometimes that meant sacrificing her own happiness. Watching your child going through horrid treatments with the hope they will get better is unimaginable to me. Yet, she was there. She always has been by my side, making tough decisions so that I can have a better life and see that what I went through better mean something. I wish I would have seen this when I was younger and we had our own issues. But that is what maturity does to you, eventually being able to see that the world does not revolve around you.
As I write this, my mom is again here by my side. She moved in with us in December to help us, to help me and most importantly be here for both my sister and her grandson. She has made my home complete and made my life so much easier so that I can rest and not overdo myself. I’m not gonna lie, I feel pretty spoiled right now.
Which brings me to this week. I have been struggling the past couple weeks, more shortness of breath and becoming exhausted easily. I think the cold and very dry air is making my PH/CHF symptoms worse. I’ve basically been a shut in except for very short outings. Today I was sitting at home bindge-watching Luke Cage with my mom, (seriously it’s a great series) when flowers were delivered. I had no idea who they could have been from. Well, they were from her! What? She takes care everything around the house I need, including making meals when I can’t and yet she took the time to send me flowers because I haven’t been feeling well!
So will I keep going, you better damn well believe I will. Always forward!